I haven’t blogged about this huge thing in our lives because I haven’t figured out how to put words together that adequately express the depth of my gratitude, relief and now hope that have replaced tension, fear and dread for our daughter and her education.

I feel like I should back up just a little and tell you about G.  She is an outside-of-the-box kind of thinker.  She notices things that no one else does.  She uses simple words that sum up exactly how she is feeling with amazing acuteness (is that a word – acuteness?  I guess she didn’t get it from me!).

Here are a couple examples that I love – when she was four she told me that a song that was on the radio made her feel like corduroy.   She didn’t like the song and I think it felt like a funny fluttery vibration like when she wears corduroy and walks.  Is that not perfect?!  Another was when she was about 5 and coloring on a cheap coloring book and she was frustrated that the felt pens were seeping through to the back of the page so she took her page to the window, flipped it over and started coloring from the back to the front!  I was astounded.    It made this wonderful fuzzy picture on the front.

She started school and was slow to read.  Now I think she shouldn’t have been pushed to read so quickly but, that is beside the point.  She also struggled with math.  Those being the two things that are actually focused on…to make a long story short – my outside-of-the-box thinker has felt dumb her whole schooling.  No teacher has ever uncovered the depths of her.  I’m not blaming them at all.  With 25-30 students per room I know they were doing the best they could for her.  This year she started at the local Jr High.  Because she tested poorly in math she was pulled out of PE to do another period of math.  The afternoons at our home were unbearable with her being stressed out of her mind with homework.

One day she came home and informed me that she just wants to be a garbage man reasoning that they make about the same as teachers but they don’t have to finish school. I decided we had an emergency at that point.

I’ve always thought that the Waldorf schools would be a good fit for G.  Hands on learning with lots of art and music.  I have for years longingly looked at the website of the school closest to us knowing we could never afford it.  I came to a point where I realized we couldn’t afford NOT to do this for her.  So we got the ball rolling to have her enrolled at the Waldorf school.

I look back at the beginning of the year and the difference we feel now – colors are brighter and everything feels warmer and I have lost the huge burden I didn’t realize I was even holding on to.

Last week was the May Day celebration at G’s school.  It was joyful and fun and just sums up how I feel right now. Here is a photo of her dear teacher whom we are so very thankful for and in our conference with him described G as intelligent.    Phhheeeewww.  That is my breath going out.